Updated: Dec 12, 2019
Nike has developed a shoe to make white kids jump higher. The shoe, with built-in springs guarantees to add 2-4 inches to every athlete’s vertical. Nike is focusing their marketing efforts on young Caucasians initially. They plan to sponsor a local basketball team, by equipping them with the new technology.
The coach of the local basketball team, Johnny Jordan, was asked about the prospect of the new technology and he stated, “Finally, something to make white kids jump higher." He continued, “My players will now be able to get net and getting net equals more trophies”.
A local dad was interviewed and said, “Back In my day, Nike came out with pumps, which gave my people hope to increase our vertical, however, this technology is by far superior”. He continued, “I tested the shoes out and was able to dunk on an eight-foot hoop with ease.” We think this technology has the potential to be utilized in old men’s leagues too.
When asked why Nike is marketing to white kids only, an official replied, “We are focusing on athletes that have historically been underprivileged in the vertical aspect of their game”. Good luck to all the players and their newfound hops.